The other day, I was checking myself out in the window. As a woman, its hard not to stare at imperfections. Being pregnant, its even harder and may induce tears. While I am not concerned about my big belly as it expands to ginormous proportions, I do worry about the other areas. I look at my calves, my thighs, my arms, my neck, and my expanding nose. I may not be able to control my belly, but I do feel like I have control over some of these other areas that don't need to grow. Areas that don't need the extra fat deposits since they have little to do with helping me push my baby out in a few months. I wonder what I can do to make these areas shine bright and if I will ever reach my former glory days as a hot speedster racing around the track.
As I was staring at my reflection in the window, I was using laserbeams to mark areas that pass or fail. I kept trying to get up on my toes so I could see my favorite part, my calves. Then I started with 'The Gun Show'. I seriously hate when I have poor definition especially when this results in flabby triceps. I will do just about anything to keep my arms from jiggling. All of the sudden as I am analyzing all of this, my husband screams out to me from the kitchen and says, "Quit staring at yourself. You look beautiful. Your only gaining weight in your belly". This melts my heart. Having my soulmate love me even when I feel 'fat' makes me smile. Who cares if he is grossed out by the belly. Who cares if he gets squimish when he sees the baby move inside of me. He is the only mirror I really need to reflect on in times of crisis. His opinion matters and counts, even over my own during these hormonal times.
What do you look at in the mirror? What are you telling yourself everyday? Do you see your imperfections or do you focus on the good stuff? Or, Do you think you are Hot Stuff?
For me, it takes daily effort to love myself for who I am at the moment, not who I was or who I may become. Many of my younger years were spent with little worth and very low self-esteem and self-confidence. Spending my younger years feeling like 'the ugly duck', it really has been a challenge to overcome since it is so deeply rooted. To overcome some of this self doubt and criticism I focus on how beautiful and unique God has made me. Different from all others, even if I am told that I have twins around the world. I also put the effort in everyday to make improvements. Having this power and knowing that I can change things that I don't like about myself, gives me daily comfort and peace. A reason to fight another day and keep going.
I love to learn about myself and love exploring my limits as a human. I also love learning about other people. What makes people tick? What do they think about themselves? How did they become the person that they are today? Sometimes I think we all are too quick to judge others based on events, attitudes, and personalities. Sometimes we have greater understanding and respect for people if we know where they are coming from. I try to love people for who they are. Sometimes its not easy, but at least I make the effort. I also can see the beauty in others, even though they may not see it in themselves.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. No matter where you come from or where you are going, today is the only day that matters. Make goals, work on imperfections, and try to love the person staring back at you in the mirror. Remove negativity from your personal space and choose to be around positivity. This includes friends, family, events, and how you talk to and about others. Focus on your attributes and side note the weaknesses. Put them aside for later or mark as 'WORK IN PROGRESS'. If you have children, note how they see you. They don't see flaws, only the person that nurtures them and loves them. Help to build that confidence in your kids too so they don't have problems down the road. No sense in passing negativity on to them. Especially since they will be caring for you in later years!
"Yesterday is History. Tomorrow is a Mystery. But Today is a Gift. That is why it is called The Present".
Till next time.
Cindy
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